Debunked Homeschooling Myths
Many families homeschool year-round, while others follow the traditional school year, with summer-long vacations. I mention this because you’re probably wondering why I’d be touching on homeschooling in January, at a time when many families are likely halfway done with their homeschool year and therefore starting a new semester.
But I think that “as for me as my family,” we’ll be homeschooling year-round because that’s the type of school calendar I followed growing up in Colombia, and that is what makes the most sense to me.
Before I get to homeschooling myths, I thought I should elaborate a little on our desire to homeschool (at least as close as possible to) year-round, with breaks (of course).
Back in the day when I was a young girl in Colombia, my school followed one of two (or three?) calendars the country had for educational institutions: I think we were on Calendar “A,” which meant we went year-round, from January to November/December, with our big break and the chance to get school supplies and everything occurring at the end of each calendar year. A competing school were on the “B” calendar, which I think meant their school year began every August or September.
(After 22+ years in the States, I still haven’t adapted to having to buy supplies, books, and uniforms in July/August, but that’s neither here nor there.)
My husband works full-time and he takes every December off. We love having him all to ourselves and he values having that break to get to spend all his free time with us. Naturally, not much schooling happens during that time because we’re all just hanging out or out and about.
But once he’s back to work in January, we’re also back in full swing, as are practically all homeschooling families as well. So what’s the difference?
Because my husband takes off every December, as opposed to the random week or so here and there in the Summer like he’d have to if our kids attended brick-and-mortar school/daycare, that means he’s working through the Summer as well.
So why wouldn’t we as well?
Homeschooling affords us the possibility of educating our kids whenever we please, so it lets us all have the SAME time off.
If Dad takes the day off, that means we’re all off doing something together as a family, instead of having him be stuck at work while the kids are on vacation and away from him and our potential bonding time for weeks at a time. And because he works from home, it’s an even bigger blessing because it means the kids get to see him throughout the day, thus affording us even more time to grow as a family.
Now on to those homeschooling myths
One morning last month I was watching a Louder with Crowder livestream that somehow morphed into a defense of homeschooling. Well, I shouldn’t say “somehow morphed” because I think it had to do with some school sh00t*r and how homeschooled children don’t devolve into the kind of thinking that motivates someone who does that kind of stuff.
Then it transitioned into how Crowder and his ex-wife are considering homeschooling their kids, and that’s how we got to the myths they subsequently debunked:
While all references for that segment are available on the Crowder website, I’ll use his list as the starting point to also bring up excellent points from the must-read book Becoming Homeschoolers by Monica Swanson, who’s homeschooled her and her husband’s four sons.
Myth #1: Homeschooling is only for the wealthy.
NO: Homeschooling can be as affordable or as expensive as you make it.
This is a very common myth, and one that data can easily disprove. I follow Dr. Peter Gray’s Substack, where he recently shared a wonderful essay on his vision for the future of education. People left plenty of thought-provoking comments, including this one:
I just started our homeschool journey with our 5 year old this year. I don’t know if families will be able to afford homeschooling. I was able to find a fully remote position that allows me to be home and still have an income. But if one parents needs to stop working to allow for the children to be home schooled, with this economy, I don’t think families can survive with only one income, especially if they have multiple children.
Which I was glad to respond to.. with hard FACTS and NUMBERS. (And Dr. Gray himself “Liked” it!)
It’s not in “quotes” because I’m including it here as both a response to all the naysayers out there who stumbled across this post, and to all of you who’d like some objective data to share with your “concerned” relatives and friends. (And because I’d be quoting myself.)
As a fellow homeschooling [and full-time stay-at-home] mom, I guarantee you that YOU can make homeschooling as affordable or as expensive as you want it to be as there’s an infinite number of free resources to help you along on your journey–from curricula, to local activities, to worksheets (if they’re your thing), the works. Here are just a handful: [Link to the video above]
For starters, reading aloud, the most important thing you can do with/to your child and which will most influence his/her future academic success, is free. A library card is free. Many cities even forego late fines for kids’ books. Local events like reading challenges from said libraries let your kiddo earn free tickets (like to the zoo, museums, etc.), which further decreases those costs you mention.
Additionally, the fact that only the wealthy can afford homeschooling is false:
– Yearly costs are significantly lower (and even more so if they’re $0) than the annual cost attributed to a kid in public school
– MOST homeschool families are at *or below* the median income level, w/65% of them earning <$75K/year
– More than HALF of homeschooling takes place w/only ONE parent in the labor force ==> This one’s key because you allege otherwise, and the data doesn’t support you.
ETA: Many states will give you back some-most of the money you’re already paying through taxes for public schools, through dual-enrollment programs or actual scholarships. Our state awards up to $8K/year/child through a new scholarship, but it also makes available other programs that give families ~$1800/year/child.
/End of my response
Again, feel free to watch the segment above and follow his team’s sources for his claims at https://www.louderwithcrowder.com/sources-december-17.
Myth #2: Homeschooling takes too long.
NO: Homeschooling doesn’t take as long as regular school.
Kids’ attention spans are very short, so school days lasting eight hours+ aren’t beneficial and can be downright detrimental.
Check out how many minutes an organization like the Illinois State Board of Education recommends kids receive instruction and stay focused for each day:

Since when do first-graders get to stay in school for just an hour each day? Or teenagers for only three hours every day?!
That’s just one school board’s opinion or findings (and aren’t they an indictment on our current school system?): Of course parents KNOW their children best, and many–if not most–homeschoolers opt out of long sessions for the sake of the kids’ sanity and well-being. Who wants to sit there for hours on end being told facts that don’t matter and that one won’t remember later on when you can instead work in short bursts doing what interests you and motivates you to keep learning?
Kids also need to move around–a lot, and their days must accommodate for this.
What about different types of families?
This isn’t just about tailoring your lessons and school days to the length of your kids’ attention spans.
It’s also about tailoring your lifestyle to your family’s schooldays–or rather, making those schooldays fit your lifestyle.
Because contrary to popular belief, homeschooling isn’t just for those families blessed to have one parent stay at home. Two-income families where both parents work full-time and even single parents can nurture the kind of environments where homeschooling thrives.
(If you have social media, an account I used to follow [I don’t have Instagram anymore] is that of Claire Denault’s @live.leaf.learn. You can watch an interview of Claire with Alex Clark here. I bring her up because she’s a single mom who was homeschooled herself and is now homeschooling her son. I see her as an inspiration to those single parents who allege that they don’t have the time to homeschool.)
Homeschooling mom of four, author, and podcast host Monica Swanson brings up in her latest book Becoming Homeschoolers another resource for homeschooling moms, a website called Working Homeschool Moms Club. Not to mention the many forums and Facebook groups there must be for parents who work while homeschooling. It CAN be done.
A note on having a two-income household, which Monica highlights as well. In case it wasn’t obvious by now, I’m a huge proponent of having one parent stay at home full-time. I don’t think kids deserve daycare and I believe that no one can love on a child more than mom or dad (or, if absolutely necessary, a highly trusted relative who you know would give their life for your child).
But I’m not naive: I’m fully aware some parents must work for genuine reasons. I also know some parents choose to both work simply to keep up with a lifestyle they can easily change or “downgrade” if they decided to try homeschooling with one parent at home. If YOU think homeschooling’s for you but aren’t sure how to make it work financially, let’s brainstorm some ideas together! Yes, feel free to contact me and we can look over financials and I can hopefully help you make an informed decision.
Anyways…
Monica also reminds that with homeschooling we’re not on anyone’s timeline, meaning WE get to dictate what happens when. If there are appointments, or a child needs more time or less time, if mom or the kids prefer to sleep in or are more active in the afternoons, etc., homeschooling just works because it allows you to make your own schedule.
Myth #3: Parents lack the “qualifications” to teach their kids.
NO: We’re the most qualified because we care for and love on the most and know them best.
Plus, teachers didn’t require certifications until the 19th Century. The “real heroes” who wanted to keep schools closed during the pandemic, who’d rather shut up to keep their pensions and retire well than speak up against the unrealistic academic expectations placed on young kids, and who have no problem demonizing concerned parents who’d like to know what’s in their child’s curriculum… are NOT more qualified to teach YOUR child.
If, at some point, your students does get to a level of Math or Science that surpasses your own knowledge (and you don’t think it’d be in your best interest to learn that together), by all means find a tutor. A tutor is someone who simply knows more about a subject. They don’t have to hold any fancy certifications to tutor. (I was a writing tutor in college and it was a passion of mine to help others make better rhetorical arguments no matter the subject.)
That’s one of the beauties of homeschooling: you can truly tailor your child’s education to how YOU know they learn best. A brick-and-mortar school aims to teach all kids the same way, but not all pegs will to fit the same holes, and not all children learn the same way or are designed to sit down for several hours at a time to “learn” something.
Besides, not all of these “heroic” teachers got degrees in education (and many of them admit to having to “de-school” themselves because what they learned doesn’t help them in their own homeschool). Many simply got degrees in English and the like, and they simply develop the interest to teach.
Myth #4: Homeschooled kids aren’t (well) socialized
NO: Homeschool kids are MORE well-adjusted than public-school kids
In Becoming Homeschoolers, Monica lists a myriad of facts that easily debunk this popular claim. I’ll summarize them enough to get our point across, but not too thoroughly so as to invite you to still get her book asap:
FACT: Homeschooled kids avoid negative socialization–i.e., peer pressure, bad words, and questionable and mature content on phones.
In turn, homeschooling can help make it easier for you as the parents to teach good social skills and admirable qualities that will stay with your children for longer.
FACT: Homeschooled kids avoid unnecessary exposure to drugs and alcohol: “Peer pressure,” Monica states, “is the number one reason adolescents begin experimenting with illegal substances.”
In contrast, “Research shows that homeschooled adolescents are less likely to smoke, vape, or use drugs or alcohol, and are more likely to avoid having friends who might influence them to experiment with these things,” Monica writes.
FACT: “Homeschooled kids also avoid (most) bullying” as the most common place where bullying occurs, Monica explains, is in (drum roll, please?) SCHOOL: In hallways and stairwells, in the classrooms, in the cafeteria, on school grounds outside, in the bathroom or locker room, and on the bus.
Homeschooling, on the other hand, “provides kids with a safe and secure environment to get through the challenging tween and teen years” (p23).
FACT: Homeschooled kids also avoid gender indoctrination, race/equity indoctrination, and racial issues in general from a biased perspective.
According to Monica, almost all of the students polled for a well-known publication reported “some form of public school exposure to both critical race theory and critical gender concepts” (p25).
Monica reminds us of the importance of teaching our kids that we’re all created by God “in a beautiful variety of shades,” and that it’s up to us to introduce them to other cultures and their histories. These lessons shouldn’t come from schools, but rather from the parents and the Church.
FACT: Homeschooled kids avoid pressure to date before they’re ready
Instead, they keep busy doing more productive things because dating doesn’t help them achieve the goals they’d like to achieve. Older teens sure can develop crushes, but the wholesome environment(s) they’ll grow and develop in allows them to be coached and guided by wisdom rather than by culture.
Homeschooling provided my sons with a secure environment, free from the pressures that can deflate kids before they’ve even had a chance to begin something. -Monica Swanson, Becoming Homeschoolers, p28.
FACT: Homeschooled kids also avoid the comparison trap
I was watching a Minimal Mom video on back-to-school shopping last year for her homeschooled kids, and something Dawn said about peer pressure really struck me. This will contradict the point I just brought up so bear with me because I’ll come back to that!
She and her husband have four kids and they attend co-ops. (A co-op in homeschool speak is a face-to-face session where students get-together to learn a particular subject from an instructor like a parent or a tutor and/or present what they’ve learned. Co-ops happen either weekly, several times a week, or less frequently.) She said that her kids still want certain brands because they’re at that age where they see other kids wearing certain brands, and so on.
But I thought that that undermined her minimalism ethos a little bit and shown to the world that no matter how much decluttering you do, kids will be kids. And if they were vain before, chances are they won’t learn the trap that vanity will lead them to until they’re adults. But enough about her. Let’s get back to Monica’s point.
Homeschooled kids really have very little opportunity to compare themselves to anyone because everything is so unique and personalized: “Test score comparisons and social pressures [are] not constantly in their faces” (p28).
* *
These factors represent huge reasons for why parents don’t want to send their kids to brick-and-mortar schools, where ^all that^ amounts to the kind of socialization that students are exposed to.
Because we had time with [our kids], all day, every day, my husband and I had the opportunity to teach and train and model proper ways to interact with the world around them. -Monica Swanson, Becoming Homeschoolers, p21. (Emphasis my own.)
Homeschooling can help keep your kids and home wholesome for longer, if not forever.
Five: It’s very difficult to find out about homeschooling and get help
NO: There’s a treasure trove of free and paid online and face-to-face resources available to aid you on your journey
If I listed them all here, I’d end up having enough content for an entirely new website (which I AM working on, actually: one especially tailored to parents in bilingual homeschools!), but I’ll list just a few so you can see how much there’s for us to look into:
- The Homeschool Legal Defense Association for your state’s requirements
- Your state’s branch of the home education association (_HEA) for basic tips on getting started
- Local Facebook groups and email newsletters
- A note on social media, in case you avoid it like I do. (I quit Instagram, deactivated my first Facebook account and created one under a pseudonym just for said groups, and rarely use Twitter, for instance.) Sometimes it’s nice to be a part of a couple local groups that communicate only on Facebook. Believe it or not, it’s through these groups (bonus points if they’re Catholic or for families from your denomination) that you can find some neat events, meetings, and pointers that will help advance your own homeschool life and culture.
- Homeschooling podcasts, incl. Protestant and Catholic ones. My favorites include:
- Simply Charlotte Mason
- The Monica Swanson Podcast and her book Becoming Homeschoolers
- The Durenda Wilson Podcast and her book The Unhurried Homeschooler
- Read-Aloud Revival and Circle with Sarah, plus her book Teaching from Rest
- Homeschooling Saints
- The Homeschool Made Simple Podcast
- Restoration Home
- Books on homeschooling and Catholic unschooling, such as those by Susie Andres.
- YouTube homeschoolers (it’s preferable that they don’t share their kids, like Jars of Butterflies, A Heart for Home Education, Seven in All, and The Commonplace | Classical CM Home Education.
- Your favorite search engine, which will definitely lead you down dozens of homeschool-related rabbit holes
- Kirk Cameron’s beautiful and inspiring, Homeschool Revival movie/documentary
- More coming later because I’d like to publish this post at some point rather than keeping it as a Draft for much longer :)
That sure was one.long.post on homeschooling. I can’t apologize for the length as there was a LOT to get to, and I hope it helped explain not only why our family’s been called to homeschool, but also the reasons why homeschooling families keep at it despite society’s mistaken beliefs about it.